12 THINGS YOU SHOULDN’T DO WHEN ANGRY

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1. TELL YOUR SPOUSE THINGS YOU WILL REGRET

In moments of anger, hold your tongue. Don’t speak insults, don’t bring up your spouse’s past as an attack. When tempers calm down, you cannot take those words back

 

2. CHEAT

Don’t run into the arms of another to hurt your spouse or to get relief. It complicates and escalates the problems in your marriage

 

3. SAY YOU WANT A DIVORCE

During moments anger, it is easy to forget the wonderful journey you two have had and lose objectivity. When angry, it is easy to want to cut yourself from the one who has hurt you; but you won’t be angry forever. You cannot build a lasting marriage if your first option is to quit, you two will offend each other, love is learning to reconcile and build better from offense. Divorce is not something to rush into irrationally, it affects so many lives and so many aspects of you. Be sober and composed when making life-altering decisions

 

4. GO AND TELL OTHERS YOUR SPOUSE’S DIRTY SECRETS

Don’t rush to tell your friends and family members your spouse’s faults and expose your spouse. When you two sort things out, it will be difficult to undo the image you have created of your spouse to others

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5. WALK AWAY AND NOT RETURN

Don’t leave the house in a fit and get a new house or a new place to stay. This is dangerous as your ego might keep you from coming back and your spouse’s ego might keep him/her from reaching out and before you know it, you two will be comfortable with being far from each other

 

6. TELL YOUR SPOUSE YOU REGRET GETTING MARRIED TO HIM/HER

Don’t make your spouse feel useless, as if he/she adds no value to your life. If you were honest, you will see the many ways your spouse has been a blessing to you (and the children)

 

7. KICK YOUR SPOUSE OUT OF THE HOUSE

Don’t order your spouse out of the house, whether you are the woman who feels entitled to the house, or you are the man who pays rent/has built or bought the house. This only ruins teamwork going forward and it makes your spouse feel disrespected and rejected

 

8. HIDE BEHIND SEX

Some people get horny during a fight or tension. If you two will have make up sex, make sure you sort out the issues

 

9. BEAT UP OR ABUSE YOUR SPOUSE

Do not raise your hand or fist on your spouse, do not threaten violence, provoke violence or throw things at your spouse. Mature emotionally to be able to express your emotions without violence

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10. WALK AWAY, COME BACK AND NOT ADDRESS THE ISSUES

If you walk away to calm down, when you come back, initiate a civil and mature conversation with your spouse about the matter. Don’t sweep things under the rug

 

11. COMMIT SUICIDE

Anger can make you think all is lost. You can get so mad that you consider taking away your life. Don’t. There is more to life than what you are going through. Your spouse is not your God. A fall out with your spouse shouldn’t lead to you taking away your life

 

12. STOP TO PRAY

Don’t let anger ruin your prayer life. Many people slowly stopped praying due to something they were mad about. In anger, push yourself to pray. It will help you

 

© Dayan Masinde

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