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Abeiku Okai
At my senior brother’s son’s recent marriage introduction, my brother made a witty comment that sparked an important realisation in me. Our fathers, all 12 of them, have passed away, leaving behind their wives – some of whom have also passed. Reflecting on this, my brother joked, “Maybe our mothers frustrated them to death.” Though humorous, it sheds light on the common phenomenon of men passing away before their wives.
While the reasons remain unclear scientifically, I believe research in the area of men’s ‘home health’ could provide valuable insights. Therefore, I’d like to offer six simple pieces of advice to women to ensure their husbands lead healthy, fulfilling lives for the sake of their families.
1. GIVE HIM PEACE.
Being a husband comes with a lot of mental stress. From the home to the workplace, your husband goes through a lot mentally than he can open up to tell you. Therefore, giving your husband peace will always be the first medication his soul would need to survive the challenges of this life and live longer to share every good time with you. No wonder the Bible says,
“Better to live on the roof than share the house with a nagging wife.” (Prov. 25:24).
2. GIVE HIM GOOD SEX.
More helpful than exercise for your husband is sex. The benefits of sex for the overall well-being of your husband cannot be overstretched. Protect his heart and his life with good and regular sex. Don’t use tiredness and mood as an excuse to deny him the opportunity to have his life persistently and consistently preserved. Take the initiative also and be active, not passive in bed. He is your husband, for Christ’s sake.
“Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth. As a loving deer and a graceful doe, Let her breasts satisfy you at all times; And always be enraptured with her love.”(Prov. 5:18-19)
3. GIVE HIM HEALTHY FOOD
It is not enough to give your husband food. You must make sure you are not just a cook but more importantly a dietician and a nutritionist also. Study all you can about healthy foods and the right eating habits and make sure your husband follows through to the latter. Make sure you have basic knowledge of what every food you give him would do in his body. Protect him for you and your children with all you can. Don’t let tiredness, laziness, and carelessness cause you to lose your guard with respect to his food. Cook his meals yourself and make sure you remove or drastically reduce his intake of sugar, junk goods, and unhealthy drinks and alcohol.
“She is like the merchant ships, She brings her food from afar. She also rises while it is yet night, And provides food for her household, And a portion for her maidservants. (Prov. 31:14-15)
4. GIVE HIM TIME
Everybody needs their spouse’s full time. But it doesn’t work that way in the real world. Everybody needs time for themselves at a certain point in time. Your husband may have moments he would want to be alone to be himself and deal with some business, spiritual, or mental issues. Whatever it is, give him that opportunity to be with himself. You can even advise him to go spend a day or a few somewhere to pray, reflect, and rejuvenate himself.
“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.” (Eccl. 3:1)
5. GIVE HIM REST
Don’t allow your husband to overwork. Life must not always be a serious game – you need to let him know that. If he is overworking himself, advise and push him to take some rest. If he is not having enough good sleep, push him to do the needful. Let him know you are more concerned with his physical and mental well-being than whatever achievement or money he can bring home.
“It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep.” (Psalm 127:2).
6. GIVE HIM SIMPLE HEALTH COUNSELING
It was through Eve’s counseling that Adam fell. A woman’s counseling is highly potent and can make a lot of difference. Unfortunately, many women do not know how to counsel their husbands so they face stiff resistance from the men, and they end up claiming the men won’t listen. As a homemaker, you should be able to study your husband and know the area he is failing regarding his health and offer some useful and helpful suggestions and support. For example, if your husband is not exercising, it would be great if you study a little about exercises and draw his attention to what he might be missing. Once you communicate well, right, and strategically, you will win him over to do the right thing for his health.
“She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness. (Prov. 31:26)
Abeiku Okai
Anathallo Chapel Int
(+233) 0249287855
Join the Couples and Singles Retreat in June for more practical trainings to spark your love-life. 15th to 17th June, 2024.